Worlds Most Wanted Man Or Overrated Cipher?

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Sheltering A Saudi Influence...

Im writing today in response to the resent insanity of censorship, spiking all time global highs, due to the deep-seated aversion of certain middle eastern sects. Specifically wealthy Saudi Muslims, using the spineless British court systems and libel laws to push their religious views upon the global masses and take away our freedoms of speech, expression, and religious choice. At the center of the controversy is the powder keg of a country known as Denmark. Where some saw a community striving towards multicultural assimilation though satirical comedy, others construed flat out xenophobic racism. From Iran to Palestine a dozen crude comic strips were blown to the proportions of "Zionist Conspiracies" and "A world wide bid to fuel a clash between the Western and Muslim worlds".

The truth of the matter is, unflattering and offensive cartoons, caricatures, and comic strips depicting religious and political leaders have been in print since the dawn of the 18th century. Their goal is to humorously provoke the reader into questioning and reflecting on said subject, in a quick, [mostly] fun spirited manner. However in the past five years the subject of self-cencership in mass publication has led to several threats on peaceful societies and a handful of deaths at the hands of these Aniconistic radicals. These Islamic groups view the depiction of their profits as a major sin; as blasphemes, iconoclasm and Idolatry [Including most Sunni Islamic practicers and the Islamic Circle of North America]. These groups interpret the book of the Shariah [or the "Way"] to warrant death to those who participate in this form of "Sacrilege". When Afghanistan was under the control of the Taliban all televisions and works of art were destroyed and news papers were forbidden to print any pictures whatsoever. In the Hadith [the narrations of Muhammad for understanding the Qur'an] it states: "Those who paint pictures would be punished on the day of resurrection and it would be said to them breath soul into what you have created."

Understanding theses few facts about the Muslim community and Islamic religion, [as brief and vague as they may be] I make this modest proposal. We as free people can not allow radical theology to effect our democracy. The Muslim profit Muhammad is an abstract Despot similar to Hitler, that cant be mentioned in mainstream media because our government knows its easier to shelter an extremists feelings then the American Eastern SeaBoard. Precautions to keep our citizens and homelands safe have been exerted for the past nine years and they continue to grow and develop to meet the challenges of both our religious and secular nationalist militant oppressors. We know first hand that extremists of this caliber will take any opportunity they can to cause an upheaval and turn peaceful nations into chaotic badlands. At the same time we must remember that there are no wars being waged in our city streets over these censorship issues. The Islam practicing radicals that would give their lives to "Breath soul into what we have created" are an impoverished, undereducated, third world people, trapped thousands of miles away, with limited finances, communication, and transportation. Rather I believe we should be protecting this country from ourselves. America averages 15-18,000 homicides in a year alone [similar to that of a truculent eastern European state] and the number is constantly fluctuating and unpredictable. Imagine how many lives we could save if the military strong arm currently being used to keep the destitute middle east in check were instead used to protect the citizens of our most dangerous cities, [Detroit, Memphis, New Orleans ] and secure our boarders and places of special interest that pose the worst security risks.

Every time we censer print and broadcast out of pure intimidation its just another victory in the eyes of Islamic fundamentalism and the global personification of Lady Liberty sinks another inch deeper into the dark murky seas of tyrannic terrorism.

Delusional, RightWing, Evangelistic, WackJobs- A.K.A. AA

Alcoholics Anonymous simply put, is a cult. After going to several different meetings, in completely different towns I can give you this unbiased opinion, from someone sitting in their circle but looking in from the outside threw the window. Because no matter how hard I tried to except and relate to these people, take what they were saying with a grain of salt, and see a positive in their words and way of life, I honestly couldn't.

The name of the meetings are crazy enough; Beyond Before, Surrender to Succeed, Singleness of Purpose, Spiritual Awakening, Eye Openers, Primary Purpose... just to name a few. But don't get me twisted. My beef isn't with sobriety. Not in the least. What gets my grapes in a vice is the fact that before every meeting a speaker reads the following, "AA is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy neither endorses nor opposes any causes." And that sounds absolutely wonderful! You guys can help me get clean without pushing your morals and ideology on me, Hell sign me up! However its not until you start reading the steps that you realize what a bunch of hypocritical pietist bullshit it all is! So lets start with step two. I wont do them all, fuck knows there aren't enough hours in the day, and by the time i get threw half of them I'll probably end up smashing my mac in a disillusioned rage...

"Came to believe that a 'Power' greater then ourselves could restore us to sanity." These people have a problem with drinking and they act like they have a serious psychiatric imbalance. Besides the fact that they've already broken their claim to a non religious alliance.. but no worries they do that a lot. Alcoholism is not a disease! therefore alcohol is not the problem. You are! If it weren't booze it would be Crack, and if it wasn't Crack it would be Dope! Your obviously just a group of people that seriously lack self control. But its something you gotta get used to. Because they don't sell Bundles and EightBalls at the corner store.. but you can buy a bottle of booze and a case of beer just about anywhere. Because its become so socially expectable to just kick it and drink as a pass time or have a brew chillin on the side while your doin other things [like operating heavy machinery, or making important life changing decisions... JustPlayin] that you pretty much have to. If your under the age of fifty and you never drink your either one of the following; a religious fanatic, serious pot head, underage, locked up, a fucking geek, or mentally handicapped.

To complete step one you must first, "Admit to your powerlessness over alcohol" and thats dog shit. Thats what we in the business call passing the buck. Because if your powerless then its not your fault and you don't have to be held accountable for your shitty actions and decision making skills prior to this recent revelation. Not to mention the fact that its an extremely self loathing and pitiful way to live your life. Counting the days that you didn't do something just seems to be such a meager and depressing way to spend ones existence. So just as long as you go to meetings and repent, and never drink again your in the clear for all the years of being a degenerate derelict. Sorry buddy, not in my book. The way I see it you never truly learned anything... Your still the same irresponsible ScumBag you were before you joined AA and started living sober. Because you still cant go out with a group of friends and just have a drink with dinner or go to the bar and take a shot when your playing darts... your "Powerless" and you cant control yourself from bingeing into a belligerently retarded stopper and turning into the JagerMonster. Blacking out, breaking a bottle of Yuengling over your buddies girlfriends head, and eluding state troopers on a high speed pursuit against apposing traffic on the highway. And then you'll wake up, say you relapsed, and thats ok because relapse is just part of recovery and you'll start all over again... "My name is Bill and I'm an alcoholic... I have three days clean since friday... I've been in AA for 23 years..." Blow it out your ass Bill.. how about learning a little self control.. showing a little restraint... drinking two beers burning a joint and going to sleep?

AA is a fucking cult filled with a bunch of Delusional RightWing Evangelistic WackJobs. Once again don't get me pretzeled. I'm happy these people are sober, and no longer living the lives of drunkards. However; do not advertise your group as non religious or claim that your not "allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution"... because thats simply not true. The term God or Him is used eight times throughout the twelve steps. Almost every meeting I've ever heard of is held in either Christian or Catholic establishments. At the close of every meeting all members are to join hands in a circle and recite The Lords Prayer with heads bowed... I've never seen any Hindus leading any of these groups, and i haven't heard any Yiddish prayers being recited by its followers . Just because you use the term "HigherPower" doesn't change the fact that your mixing specific theology with much needed therapy, and thats dangerous on so many levels! These people read and preach their "BigBook" like its fucking scripture and spew meaningless sayings like, "To Drink Is To Die!" Who told the bitch she had to drink two handles of vodka to the dome in one sitting!? What the hell happened to responsibility and moderation? Rather then learning a little discipline, these BasketCases seek divine intervention where there's none to be found, and continue their loony self-absorbed lifestyles of turning mountains into mole hills, just like they did when they were "Using".

Book Store Bonanza

So im at the bookstore the other day... you know just stalkin around the romantic novel section, scopin out the Cougars and Gmilfs... Goddamn we got some sexy 40 and up cutie pies now-a-days! Oh yes fellas! Their out and about in the early afternoon; Pottery Barn, AC more, Borders... Shakin that 80's ass, spendin up hubbies "CashMoneyyy"!!! Buyin books and nicknacks for the house and little projects to keep em occupied. So anyways I'm at the bookstore, doin what I do. Pretending to skim over the spines, but its pretty obvious I'm not lookin for a paperback... No sir, I'm lookin for a nice fat-backed middle aged divorcee that'll give me shoulder rubs and make me breakfast in bed at noon... Clip my toenails and call me Big Reggie... And I got one in the crosshairs!

So i guess in seeing this some little cockblockin fruit fly comes buzzin up, pokes me on the shoulder, and goes "~Excuse me sir? Can I help you find something~?" And it just totally caught me off guard, this guys HomoErotic accent lisping out thicker then molasses, that by the time I turned back around my BiggityBomb-SingleMom was nowhere to be found. And I'm pretty heated by my Little Gray That Got Away, so i turn to the guy and go, "Yeah buddy as a matter of a fact you can... I've been lookin all over the place... and I must be blind... You guys wouldn't happen to have a section on, really really hardcore interracial pornography would you? And I'm not just talkin White girl Black guy... I'm talkin about that really dark stuff! like two Chinese guys doubling up on a dirty overweight latino chick thats talkin shit the whole time like, 'Come on you little yellow motherfuckers! I can take it!'"

Needless to say, for a guy that sticks things in his butthole, he looked at me like I was battshit crazy before asking me to leave. But on the ride home it really got me thinking... What if I was dead serious? RealTalk... what if i was perusing around Barnes&Noble for like a half hour before i finally realized, they dont sell porn.. I'd be a little salty! Like, "Umm Excuse me sir.. yeah wheres your section on FFM Basement Bondage? ...Whoo Whoo, what do you mean smut? Ok I'm gonna have to have a word with your manager... This is just unacceptable..."

Not even a book on tape audio erotica section in the back! Da Fuck!? No wonder why no ones kids can read... To hell with education reform, we need Porn Reform!!! I guarantee if we got em when they were young... Make some popup books where you open em up and its some skank spreadin her knees, the number of illiterate inner city kids in public schools would drop dramatically!

AnyWays... where was i goin with this... oh yeah, 80's ass! Where did you go? After 94 you vanished from playboys and television, and i miss you... You were plumper, and longer, and i dont know what they were puttin in the water back then but we gotta reinstate that one ASAP! Because the 80's ass is an endangered species.. you get lucky and see one every once in a blue moon on a sexy 40 year old that takes care of it... keeps up on the maintenance and still wears a pants suit. But on the real, there just aren't enough to go around anymore... and something must be done!

Haters

So I got an email from some self proclaimed "Blogger/Webmaster" at like 3am last night. The creeper must have been voiering around late night touching himself to pictures of peoples kids on family vacation when he came across my posts. RealTalk, this fuckin loser spends his saturday nights trolling around on Blogspot getting his tampon in a bunch when he finds something he doesn't agree with. Apparently he had a problem with me referring to gay men as "frilly homos''.. to which i replied "Look Bro, I don't go to Starbucks and smack the venti tumbler out your hands when when your spankin off a queer coworker to get that extra foam, so don't tell me how to run my shit!"

So the guys threatening to file a complaint.. in his words, "Report The Abuse Of My Webpage" unless I, "Immediately Cease And Desist" with my "Sexist, Gay Bashing, Racism". What a crock of shit...

Like for real bro.. What happened? It was late.. Your Orc Marford kept getting killed in the Catacombs so you finally shut down the WOW account for the first time in 36 hours? FoxNews was playing reruns of The Best Of Wolf Blitzer? Your moms was asleep so no one was around to make you a midnight snack? So you gotta seek entertainment threw being a little overly sensitive bitch and spreading your douche-baggery and bullshit ideals across the web? Who makes it their personal moral obligation to play police? Their life's mission to go around tattletaling on people voicing obviously sarcastic comical opinions for their own sense of self satisfaction?

Its like here comes BigBrother... and he woke up on the wrong side of the studio apartment! Someone must have diarrhea-d in his mocachino... because your having too much fun! And if BigBros got sand in his butthole then he's gonna try and rub some in yours too! And He'll take your toys and make threats and kick and scream to try and bring you down to his Faggy-Internet Savvy- Hipster [Webster] level.

So to the self important crybabies surfing the web with a chip on their shoulder... to you I make this simple suggestion... Stop sitting on your hand till it goes numb and masturbating with Icy Hot and go eat a fat bag of dicks! Because we all know your just a bunch of conservative cock suckers with nothing else better to do then piss on my parade.

Its not my fault your uncle used to make you star in his basement movies till you turned 14 and got too old...

Its not my fault everyone you've ever met hates your guts and thinks your a tool...

Its not my fault your cousin died in that freak snowmobile accident.. and I'm sorry but being a prick to me isn't going to get him back on his feet!

So no sir... I will not cease.. nor will I desist... Because getting these pussy ass crybabies that irritated has gotta be a good sign that I'm doing something right!

Jen Golding haha nice...the last post being particularly interesting

Chris DuPlayee BLOGSPOT IS HOT!!! KEEP IT BUBBLING...PAUSE

Kseniya Ignatova Eloquent... True. Terrible, lol

Marvin Odel Lambert good shit do work reggey

- Thanks for readin guys... Until next time, BlessBless...

[I Fear I May Risk Alienating My Female Counterparts With This One]

[Fuck It!]

[Just Remember Ladies... Its All In Good Fun...]

I love Beer... Does anyone else drink beer anymore?

[No you dont.. Stop lying...]

Its all those pink and purple Captain&Pomegranate CozmoTinis and shit. These mixed drinks now a days not only cost as much as a good 6pack of imports, but they taste like something a frilly homo that works at Jamba Juice would drink. Thats without mentioning the fact that their super strong, overly alcoholic concoctions specially designed to turn your Born Again Christian girlfriends into a Piss Drunk, Cock Craving, Slut Machines...

Which is what brings us to the term, "Girls Night Out". If your female ever tells you she's "Going out with the girls for drinks", simply Clear your throat, take a big deep breath ...and Scream at the top of you lungs, "Fucking Lier!!!" Tell the trick to Stop lying and just tell the truth... because we all know what she's gonna do.

"Your gonna drink half a LongIsland IcedTee, bum a cigarette and light it the wrong way, sing Ebony and Ivory with your token black friend at karaoke, and spend the rest of the night on your back, with a bunch of dudes i used to go to high school with and an HD FlipCam!"

And girls are the absolute worst because no matter what they wont admit to shit for months. But if and when the conniving skank does crack they always give you the same bullshit line, "I cant remember what happened!"

... Oh no worries sweetheart... Its all over the internet... I'll fill you in. There's an app for that! Trick Tracker! Slut Search!

Lopez Tonight

George Lopez is an unfunny hack with an over enlarged tortilla trap. He uses his racial background as a comedic crutch to get cheep, childish laughs from people of the same ethnicity with predictable punch lines. Just because your show is on at eleven O'clock and you wear a suit does not make you a late night host. Lopez Tonight airs on TBS... after six straight hours of Family Guy... nuff said...

Get off Tiger's dick and back the fuck off the Lowrider song. We get it George.. you like your food grilled in tinfoil. Congratulations sir, you have officially become the Jeff Foxworthy of brown people. That being said, i plead you Mr. Lopez.. Sit down and Shut up before I personally fly out to LA and hack your kneecap with a pinata stick!

Fuckin Tool...